So Many Memories, So Little Time...

Wow Kat. You have spent 18 years, and roughly 9 months on this planet, and look at all the things we have been through- 15 years of Christmas's, Birthdays, Easters and School Disco's where at least one of us cried and hid in the staff toilets till we were picked up and dragged back home.

For some reason, my first memory of you was at Stanton Nursery/Playgroup thing, where we made vegetable soup with Mrs Frost and Miss Fairhead. That soup was absolutely vile, but we ate it anyway and complained later. I think that set the tone of our friendship for the next decade and a half really. And then there were the infamous Primary School disco's, where we danced to the Neighbour's theme tune, and Yazz's classic 'The Only way is Up'. Wonderful dance moves- we have improved greatly in time for the many Rugby Club Parties. *Grinding*

We only ever fell out once I recall, when, like Rihanna, you decided that you would become a...murderer...I still believe to this day, that the killing of one of my newly hatched snails, was unnecessary and wrong. But it's not like we fell out for long, seeing as how we had choir, Brownies, recorder club and prayers to do. Oh Rev. Oliver, with your buttons popping out, and the stain that never seemed to get cleaner over the weeks...Hah.

Many people ask me why you dislike the French so much, and I tell them the tale of the Year Four Nativity Play, in which dear Mrs Kirk decided to make you dress up as an onion seller- I on the other hand, wore a lovely Chinese Dress- it's a basic jealousy issue really. And I think, after reading this passage back, you will call me a geek, because it's really badly written, like some kind of leaflet one might find at the doctors *Ricky Gervais* . Basically, I am trying not to swear, which seems unnatural to me.

I know what your favourite hymn is, but here is the one you chose for grace on your birthday:

God is Great,
God is Good,
God we thankyou for our food,
we're gonna praise you morning, noon and night,
We're gonna praise you Lord, You're outta sight,
Amen *Clap Clap*
Amen Amen Amen *Clap Clap Clap Clap Clap*

But getting out of Primary School, lets talk about the time you threw up on my head. Oh yes, don't deny it, you did! It was at the 'Back to School' RC Party, and you chucked up in your hands. Thanks- although I am sure you've had more than your fair share of my exploits. You also covered me in stale beer at Primary School in the can crusher thing.

I hope we have 18 more fantastic years of Top Gear, Dr West and Oliver West )Are you looking for Oliver West? If so, he is skateboarding down the park with his mother), SCREAMING to Queen in your car 'Poli', Holby City (Dr Matt) and The Cribs, they have been proper good Kat- Happy 18th!


Oh, and P.S, why do we have fringes in EVERY photo?! The 'Smile' one makes it look like I think you smell, and am backing away from you- I ensure you that this is not the case.